Stars
by Mimosa In The Morning
Summary: Finn doesn't know why he never saw fireworks with Rachel... ONESHOT set in season two at the end of episode twelve 'Silly Love Songs' Finchel


Stars

DISCLAIMER: Nothing is mine except for the plot. The dialogue is all from the season two episode twelve of GLEE 'Silly Love Songs'. This is what I imagined to be going on in Finn's mind during the Nurse's Office scene with Rachel. Don't judge too harshly, I wrote it in thirty minutes and didn't proofread so... Continue at your own risk. -Mimosa In The Morning

"Where's Quinn?" She asked just as Finn was rousing out of his miserable sleep.

"Huh?" He remembered where he was as suddenly as he'd forgotten how amazing it was to kiss Quinn. "Her mom picked her up a few hours ago."

Of course Rachel would want to talk now- she always seemed to pick the most dramatic and uncomfortable places to confront him. Apparently, being quarantined in the nurse's office with mono was just as Broadway as anything.

"Quinn really is very pretty." It would be impossible for Finn to say just how much he did NOT want to have this conversation. The last thing he needed was for Rachel to, again, throw herself at him- especially when he felt like something that should be stuck to the bottom of Puck's combat boots.

"You don't have to do that, you know," he said instead- referring to the cool washcloth she placed on his forehead.

"No," she insisted lamely, "I would do this for anybody."

But she wasn't doing it for anybody- she was doing it for him. Now his head was pounding harder.

"She's prettier than me." That was a sentence he was used to; something he could handle. It might even be easier this time, now that they were broken up, because now he didn't have to worry about saying the wrong thing and not getting to touch her boobs later.

"Would you stop? You're beautiful." Oops. He hoped that the obsessed part of Rachel wouldn't take that as a 'welcome back' sign.

"I know she is." Finn was all too surprised when the subdued Rachel answered him- that obviously meant something... But he was too out of whack to know what. "It meant so much to me that you chose me over her. Girls like me don't get chosen over girls like her very much."

Finn just listened, trying to concentrate on her voice and not on the sterile but not at all awful pillow beneath his head.

"Did you kiss her? Like Santana said?" Her voice was so quiet, so un-Rachel, Finn figured it was because he was so damn tired.

"Yeah, yeah... But I-I just needed to get it out of my system." That was a lie to make her even a little bit happy. Finn wanted Quinn more than ever now; it was because Quinn didn't know what she wanted that he was holding back.

She was still avoiding his eyes. Or at least he thought she might be- his eyes were getting more and more feverishly blurry the longer be kept them open.

"So, what did it feel like? When you kissed her?"

He was delirious; he told her the truth without a second thought. When his lips touched Quinn's, for the first time in what felt like centuries, the only way to describe the sensation was-

"Fireworks."

"Did you see fireworks? When you kissed me?" Her half smile seemed to already know the answer that Finn did not.

Did he see fireworks with Rachel? Did her lips ever set his ablaze like Quinn's did? It all seemed so strange now, lying helpless at the mercy of his ex-girlfriend, that he couldn't remember a single time in their relationship when Rachel had given him such an oral light show. Why had he even loved her, if he never felt a fraction of what he felt with Quinn?

It wasn't until she was almost out of the curtain that he realized she had moved. He didn't remember deciding to sit up until all the blood rushed to his head, making him even more dizzy. Why was he sitting up, anyways? "Rachel, wait-"

"No." Well, it was probably better that she stopped him... What was he going to say to her? No, you never made me feel like Quinn makes me feel? Quinn lights a firecracker and you... What do you do? No. Letting her do the talking would be better for both of them. Besides, he was starting to see stars.

"It's good," she continued, folding and unfolding her hands on front of her- very un-Rachel indeed. "Thank you. Look, you've given me the strength to move on. I know now that there's nothing here for me anymore."

"That's not the truth." Stop talking. Who was he to be giving lessons on the truth? Isn't being truthful what caused this whole mess in the first place? Rachel was giving him such an easy break by being willing to walk away calmly... But a calm and easy break was such the opposite of Rachel's true nature that Finn couldn't let it go. He couldn't let it end any different than how it began- with a show.

"I still... I just," he fumbled. "I'm so confused in my head right now."

"No, it's okay." So much for a show... Rachel was backing down from a chance to be in character, so something was really wrong for her to be taking this... Whatever this was... So seriously.

"Look, I understand," she shrugged lightly. "Now I'm free to pursue my dreams without anything holding me back. And," she added with an un-Rachel smile that brightened the room in no way whatsoever, "you've actually inspired my song selection for this week's love song assignment."

Finn just stared after her as she slipped away, slightly unnerved by the fact that he didn't know what song she was talking about. There was once a time when he could read her lyrical mind like an open book... Now it was as if someone had shredded every piece of music they'd ever sung together.

He let his throbbing head fall back against the pillow to rest his eyes before his mom would be able to come and get him. Rest, and wonder why everything was so confusing. Why Rachel was being so different... Why he all of a sudden felt sparks at Quinn's touch... Most of all, why he never felt fireworks with Rachel.

He didn't find his answer until the night of Nationals, standing on stage with Rachel and staring into her competition drunk eyes. He recalled the words he said to her in the nurse's office, "would you stop? You're beautiful," and they were never truer than in that moment. She was the only person on stage... The only person in the WORLD... and when his lips touched hers, he realized why he'd never seen fireworks with Rachel Berry.

When he kissed Rachel Berry: He saw stars.


End file.
